18 June 2011

A Midsummer Month's Madness

So, we are more than midway through the month of June. Celebrating every special occasion ever invented by man, woman and child. Gathering for breakfasts, lunches, dinners, concerts, graduations, midsummer fetes, weddings, anniversaries. Singing Happy Birthday for the umpteenth time, not just for those born this month but also for all those born in July and August – months when ‘people are away.’ Home becomes a pit stop, which we run into and out of, changing clothes at a speed the Formula One teams just last month in Monaco could only envy.

It is crazy, it is exhausting and yes, it is fun. If I dare say so, maybe too much fun for one single month. There are, after all, eleven other months in the year that could stand to have a little extra amusement packed into them (possibly excluding December.) With the logical exception of Graduations, could not some of these other events be spaced out so that we maybe have more merriment in say, March?

I know, I know, it seems necessary to pack everything into June because afterwards people scatter for ‘real’ summer as defined by school vacation. Holidays. Lasting what, a couple months? Much as I love and adore my friends, summer holidays do not entail our final goodbyes, they just mean we will see each other again on a regular basis after about 60 days.

I don’t mean to sound grumpy, and it could well be that I’m just tired, that I’ve had too much to eat and too much to drink at too many year-end events. Which is what at least half of the celebrations are called – year-end choir concerts, year-end shows, not to mention the year-end exams to get the kids through before the year-end-say-goodbye-to-the-football-coach-picnic. It all goes to prove my long harbored belief: celebrating New Year’s on the 1st of January is idiotic. The New Year begins in September and ends in June. In between there are July and August, as I said, the months ‘people are away.’

But it’s crazy. It’s not just me. Talk to anyone and that’s what they say, it’s crazy, I’m crazy, it’s insane – an insane month. If you don’t believe me, you need only look up some of the ‘official’ June celebrations. I’m not talking about Father’s Day (which of course has to fall in the month when mothers are already at their wit’s end and like, they need to buy yet another gift and oversee kids making cards.) No, there are other official celebrations like the North American Yell  ‘Fudge’ at Cobras Day (I promise all my readers I could not make this up – it is an official holiday and well beyond the scope of my imagination.) Its purpose is to keep fudge-detesting cobras south of the Panama Canal. I can personally offer no greater proof of June’s insanity than this single fact. Then again, maybe it’s just my grumpiness and it’s only a good excuse to bake some fudge. Which leads me to wonder, does anyone in the world still have that kind of time? To make fudge? And in June?  Are we not squeezing our not yet tanned bodies into bathing suits by now? Fudge, anyone? Come on, just one little piece to scare a cobra!

There are, of course, others reasons to celebrate in June for those who don’t have enough friends and occasions of their own. Like the birthdays of Helen Keller and Captain Kangaroo. And Teddy Bear Day and Independence Day in Slovenia, Croatia and Mozambique. There is Yo Yo Day, Egg Day, Juggling Day and a nice one, Best Friend’s Day. There is also the Happy Birthday to the Happy Birthday Song Day – like the song needs this. Then, the month ends with Superman’s Birthday on June 30th. That’s right. The flying man made of kryptonite was born the last day of June – and there are websites full of party ideas to celebrate his birthday. A cartoon character’s fictitious birthday. Who decides these things? Why JUNE? He isn’t real! Why not when things are calmer?  Superman, I am so very sorry to disappoint you, but we’re just too busy to give you a party this year.  Let’s talk in November.

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